I had a massage tonight. It was the best. I don’t understand why anyone would spend money on any other stress relief. A massage is the best. I have been having massages for probably 20 years. At some times I have had only one or two a year, now I have at least 4 a year. I feel it has really improved my health and helped me a lot. I love to massage the people I love but can rarely sustain the effort for more than half an hour. It is really great to pay for a massage, as I did tonight and enjoy over an hour of total attention to your needs. It is amazing. I feel great. Just do it. You will never look back!
Observing ease….
I have felt a lot of ease about returning to work. Things that once instigated rage in me are not so upsetting now. Something has changed. I think the fact that my own children are no longer at the school where I work has taken some of the emotional charge out of wanting things to be the best they can be for them. I am not sure this is a good thing to lose. Does this mean I don’t care as much now that I am not driven by the self interest or my childrens interests? I have a feeling I may actually be a better, calmer teacher though. I have to observe it all and reflect more on it. I also don’t have a leadership position. I guess I feel less responsible for the disorganisation so I have patience with it. I don’t want to stress anyone else out like I was feeling a lot of the time whilst I was in that position. I am enjoying the conversations I am having with others more because I am not in a position of service to them as much. I feel I can choose more about what I contribute and do more than I could before. I felt obligated to do certain things before and this was like a chain around me. I have also let go of expectation. I have given up. I have less attatchment to the place. It has come down from it’s pedestal and it’s now just a workplace. Although I am uncertain about what has exactly caused the ease I am feeling, I am not stopped from thoroughly delighting in it.
The Weir
The weir has extended my holidays now that we have returned home. The weather has been warm and each afternoon we have driven out and had a swim. I’ve enjoyed the water this year like no other since I was a kid. These holidays have lasted longer and been more pleasurable.
The first day we were there, a family of kids was in the water where we were swimming and it was fun listening to the kids conversations. One kid (a girl I think) jumped in and said “oooh seaweed.” The boy replied “It’s not seaweed, you goose, it’s weir weed.” It was funny. The weed put me off a little at first, but the rest was too good to be skittish about that. After all I walk through grass to get there, what’s the big deal?